So I bought Season 1 of That 70's Show yesterday. I was so happy to find it at a cheep price. I plan on getting Seasons 2-4 with my next check, so I'm excited.

I feel like such a 70's reject nerd. It's friggin tubular, dudes!

I swear, I think my perfect decade is the 70's. Maybe the 60's. I should have so been born in the 70's. I am the present day Donna. Except I'm not a real red head and I'm not dating an Eric Forman. I'd say that Andrew is Hyde. (I think it's a tie between Hyde and Fez with good looks! ^^) I don't know what anyone sees in Kelso. He's really not that great of a looker. Even outside of That 70's Show, he's still not that great looking.

It kind of reminds me how I saw a magazine at work yesterday with Johnny Depp on the cover as the hottest man alive. And yes, yes, I totally agree. I mean, who can really compete with that? If anyone says Jacob Black or Edward Cullen, I'll stab you in the eye! They are ugly as they will get. Me and my co-worker Victoria agree that Edward looks like he got out of bed with that hair of his and he just put a shit ton of greese in it and kept the bed-head look to it. And Jacob Black has a scrunched up face that makes him look like he's smelling shit on his upper lip. I'm sorry, for all you Twilight fanatics out there, but "Edward" and "Jacob" are poor excuses of what you would call a vampire and a werewolf. And Bella? :sarcasticlaugh: Don't even get me started on that twat! She has the personality of a rock and almost looks like she has a monobrow. Not only that, she's an emo! Who would spend an entire book crying over a boy and wish for their death? Actually, that last part is perfect. She can die for all I care.

But seriously, the entire series is mormon propoganda! Not that I disrespect mormons, but Stephenie Meyer didn't have to advertise it in what should have been a gorey and battle-action series. And to continue with that, what kind of moron makes vampires glitter? If Edward was gay, I'd understand. But even then, he'd turn to ash or catch fire as soon as he stepped into sunlight. That entire series is so hopelessly corrupting young girls. To what extent? Let's list them, shall we?

1)It's teaching girls to go after the "hottest" (pfft... considering Edward, what a joke!), richest boy in school. To top it off, it will also want them to find a guy who's a vampire. Seriously?! (I've actually talked to a fan and she was talking about wanting to find an actual vampire. WTF???)

2)It's teaching girls the wrong message about sex. In the books, the closest that Edward and Bella come to sex is touching hands and kissing. It's teaching girls that sex won't hurt them and its harmless, like holding hands. WRONG! Not only that, it's also teaching them that they should do anything the guy wants them to do in order to be with them. That's not love, you pre-pubescent twits! It's prostitution.

3)It teaches girls to act just like Bella (the helpless, damsel in distress with no personality) so they will capture the boy of their dreams...who fights werewolves and "rogue" vampires. Gimme a break!

4)It teaches everybody that a second grader can write a "wonderful story" and get it published. As long as it's a vampire/werewolf love triangle story. Ever since Twilight came out, I've been seeing more and more "vampire" books that are easy reads. Something a child could read. And very possibly be the author of it, to boot! As in, it takes away creativity from writing vampire novels for years to come because someone will ALWAYS compare it to Twilight.

5)Finally, it's teaching girls that, when a guy breaks up with them, that no one wants to be with them, lowers their self-esteem, and that they should kill themselves. (Personally, if anyone takes after Bella and does that, they don't really deserve to live. Their IQ is damaging the atmosphere.)

So, in conclusion, I want to add that I don't hate everybody that reads the novels. Those who aren't die-hard fans, that imagine they're snogging Edward or Jacob at the age of 16, aren't the ones I hate or wish to be killed. Like your little story books, I don't care. Just don't EVER tell me that they are great novels and teach a life lesson. I will stab you in the retina.

And if you don't like my rant, good for you. Don't try to reason with me. Don't even say that I should give Twilight a better chance. Fuck no! I gave it one shot. That was it. And it was god awful. And don't even try to prove me wrong. I'm entitled to my opinion like everyone else. I'm just putting mine out there. You don't have to read it, like I have to hear some of you out there about how you drool over those pathetic books.

Sincerely,
The Ranting
Pherrin